Being A Housewife Isn’t Degrading If You’re Truly Thankful

[00:00:04] You're listening to Casual Talk Radio where common sense is still the norm. Whether you're a new or a longtime listener,

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[00:00:17] And now here's your host Lyster.

[00:00:21] Happy Memorial Day to those out there Casual Talk Radio.net. My name is Lyster. I'm your host. It's a challenging day.

[00:00:27] It's a challenging weekend. It's a challenging week. I have a lot going on so I'm scattered.

[00:00:34] Not stressed, just scattered. There's a lot of coordinating and chasing down and haranguing, you know.

[00:00:42] So the story, and if you do welcome, but the story is I just the deal's done for the place

[00:00:50] I was trying to purchase. It's done. I was told by the bank they're about to wire funds. To me that means

[00:00:54] they're done. If the money's being wired, if the money's going it's a done thing because

[00:00:59] if you're taking my money, the bank, and it's the same bank that I bank with. So it's not like,

[00:01:03] you know, but if you're taking the money, I take that as okay this is a done deal. It's

[00:01:07] a purchase set in stone. And I did a couple of updates about the home buying process which I will

[00:01:12] get back to in the coming episodes because it seems like it's a popular topic for certain

[00:01:17] people. And it does not connect to today's because today I wanted to share, I'll get back to the book

[00:01:24] discussions a little bit. Then I'm going to be talking about some other facets, but the book

[00:01:29] conversation I think is important because with this purchase of the place I'm getting, part of

[00:01:35] the plan is to get it. There's some improvements I have to do to it, but part of this plan is to

[00:01:40] get back as in get back fully, get back into some of the book reading groove that I was

[00:01:46] doing before mostly because I have a sense as I work technology, when you're reading

[00:01:53] technology, when you're parsing information through technology, the default is that they are

[00:01:59] steering you to topics. They're steering you to content. It's called engagement. What they want

[00:02:05] you to do is to stay on the platform. It doesn't matter if it's YouTube, TikTok, X,

[00:02:10] Facebook, Instascam. It doesn't matter what the platform is. They want you to stay there,

[00:02:14] even Amazon. They want you to stay there and binge browse. You don't realize that's happening

[00:02:20] to you, which is disturbing. I see zombies when I walk around and when I drive around,

[00:02:27] I see zombies around me and the zombies. I don't know how we get, I understand the power

[00:02:34] of what they're doing on people, but I don't understand why people don't stop and think

[00:02:40] about the impact it's having on them because if I think back to the TV era,

[00:02:46] one of the things that happened in the TV era was this idea that certain shows were triggering

[00:02:52] violence or certain shows are triggering sexual assault or something. And it was debunked.

[00:02:57] Like society said, that's crazy. You know, Jackass was a show and you know, people are

[00:03:03] going out here doing these. We didn't have a lot of people going out doing that. Do we have

[00:03:07] people that do it? Yes, but it wasn't a widespread thing. It was presented as if it was,

[00:03:12] but it was not a widespread thing. So I always question, I have questioned why it is that with

[00:03:19] mobile phones and other devices that people seem to be welcoming the zombie effect placed

[00:03:25] upon them. I had a conversation about the EV, the rush to EVs, which I'm telling you

[00:03:30] is a catastrophic mistake. All I said was, and I knew it was unpopular the moment I jumped in,

[00:03:36] but it gave me a sense of the demographic shift. All I said was if you're going to do

[00:03:40] this, you need to figure out how to accept cash because cash is king. It's still out there.

[00:03:47] There's still a demographic is going to do it. And if you're smart about it,

[00:03:50] you're going to welcome cash as a form of currency whenever you can,

[00:03:54] because it's what keeps you from going into debt or living check to check,

[00:03:58] which there will be an episode that talks about that at length. I got crazy amounts

[00:04:04] of pushback. There was only out of like 70 respondents. I got one person who was reasonable

[00:04:08] in the response who basically said, I don't mind the idea. You know, the option, if I choose to

[00:04:14] have it, that's, that's it. It's an option to be able to do it. Not saying it should replace

[00:04:18] cards or phones, but when you have something that forces you to have a phone, some of

[00:04:23] the respondents actually said we're moving to a world of phone payments. These are delusional

[00:04:29] folks. These are people that are zombies. They're in the bubble. They don't understand. They

[00:04:33] don't understand how negative that is to even think that that's a reasonable next step in

[00:04:40] evolution, that you should rely on a mobile phone to do things. It it's like, well,

[00:04:47] did you not understand what happened in Chicago with the cars where they literally couldn't

[00:04:51] charge? You're leaving yourself in a single point of failure and the rebuttal invariably is

[00:04:56] well, that's rare. It's rare. So you're dealing with the thing where your phone has

[00:05:02] to be replaced because your phone is going to fail roughly every three years ish because

[00:05:06] there's the idea of planned obsolescence. Look it up. They build the phones to fail.

[00:05:13] When your phone fails, you now have to set up a new phone because of all the different

[00:05:18] apps and things you use. It's harder to set up a new phone when your phone fails because

[00:05:23] you're creating single points of failure. Now contrast that with my computer where I've never

[00:05:27] had to do such a thing with my computer because if something were to happen to the computer,

[00:05:33] all the stuff is stored on a drive that I can move to another computer and I'm up and running

[00:05:37] again. What people don't seem to understand is the difference and I get the basics but I don't

[00:05:44] think they understand the impact. The basics of sustainability. How can you continue doing

[00:05:52] what it is that you need to do without with minimal disruption? With the move I'm doing,

[00:05:56] this is what I'm telling the story. With the move I'm going to have to do, that move is going to

[00:06:01] start effective tomorrow. I have to get up arguably about four or five o'clock in the morning.

[00:06:06] I have to get breakfast situated as in prepared and then consumed without choking myself.

[00:06:14] I have to check in with my endeavor and make sure they understand I'm going to be kind of

[00:06:17] intermittent access because I've got a drive for an hour and a half to get to the place

[00:06:22] the first time. Once I get there, I have to coordinate with one person. We have to do a

[00:06:29] walkthrough of a thing and then I have to go back the opposite direction about you know 15

[00:06:34] minutes. I know it's stupid but this is the reality. I'm going to be on the road the whole

[00:06:38] time. I'm not going to have dedicated access to something but I'm always going to have

[00:06:43] cash in my pocket during the whole time. You know why? Because if something happens

[00:06:49] I may need to call a tow driver. Now I happen to have a service that has tow involved as part of

[00:06:54] my insurance. The point is let's say that service isn't available. Let's say I didn't have it.

[00:06:59] I want to make sure I have cash on hand. I can stop to the nearest gas station, get something

[00:07:03] to eat, get some drink, you know get a prepaid card or whatever I need to do in the

[00:07:07] event of an emergency. It's just in case something were to happen but also if I need

[00:07:12] to get gas. It's quick and painless. People swore it's slower. It's not slower. I've already

[00:07:16] measured it. It's roughly the same time if you're dealing with a gas station that has competent

[00:07:20] workers behind the desk and I know that's hard but I have to do all this while I'm working.

[00:07:27] I'm still on the clock effectively because I choose to be. I could choose to not be on

[00:07:30] the clock but I want to take care of my endeavor, make sure they're good. We just

[00:07:34] had a major launch. I want to make sure they're in good spots and it just so happens

[00:07:37] that the timing falls in perfectly on this day instead of a later day because I wanted

[00:07:42] to get this done. It's like ripping the bandaid off. I happen to drive a plug-in hybrid.

[00:07:50] I can plug in anywhere. It doesn't matter. I just need to have a power outlet but if I didn't,

[00:07:54] if I were forced to go full EV, I'm now held at the mercy of these chargers that force you

[00:08:01] to create an account, force you to have an app on your phone and I'm sorry I don't find

[00:08:05] that acceptable so I suggested as a free business plan figure out a way that the gas

[00:08:11] station attendant because there always is going to be an attendant of some kind

[00:08:15] can simply issue a code for the device. You pay cash, they give you a code just like the car wash.

[00:08:19] You go out to the charger, you enter the code, boom you're charging for 20 bucks or 30 bucks.

[00:08:25] It was appalling how many people were turning against that idea. The simple idea of having

[00:08:29] options and choices that are more choices instead of everybody has to do it that way

[00:08:35] like it. And then they included, which is real and has been a thing for decades,

[00:08:41] the real problem with some of the chargers that being copper theft. Copper theft if you

[00:08:47] didn't understand metal scrap metal is valuable. You can resell it and make a lot of money.

[00:08:56] So all of the different technologies that we install in footprint across the nation

[00:09:00] are at risk if you don't have tight security on them which many of them do not.

[00:09:05] They try to rip the copper actually out of them or whatever type of scrap metal they can get

[00:09:10] and then they sell it to scrap metal purchasers for the cash that's all they really care about.

[00:09:15] There's vandalism risk, there's all these different risks that are real risks.

[00:09:20] So one of the rebuttals being well somebody has to collect cash of course but what's the

[00:09:24] down you still have to maintain the machine it's not like your hands off of it. That's the flaw

[00:09:31] of assuming technology and automation and AI is somebody still has to maintain that hardware

[00:09:36] it doesn't matter you haven't saved on the need to go to the machine and do something.

[00:09:41] So what's the difference of just collecting a box from the machine of cash versus this then

[00:09:47] it went to crime somebody can still steal your card but the bubble which I described

[00:09:53] the bubble is well yeah you can report your card lost or stolen right on your app deep deep deep

[00:09:57] they don't understand that's assuming you knew right away that it was stolen versus you just

[00:10:03] misplaced it versus you just dropped it. I had a situation happen recently one of my debit

[00:10:08] cards went missing I know what happened to it I left it in the machine I leave it in the machine

[00:10:13] no problem I go back home I know nobody can use it because of the way it's set up but the

[00:10:17] point is I go back home and I lock the card and I request it lost or stolen it still took

[00:10:22] these jokers a month to get me my replacement card. If cash is stolen from me right the cash

[00:10:29] is stolen it's gone but that's kind of on me I carried so much cash that okay I probably

[00:10:35] deserve that but if it's a twenty dollars it's whatever for somebody that might be life

[00:10:39] changing money but if you're carrying twenty dollars and you're put in a situation where it's

[00:10:43] stolen from you it's going to be a fight right they're going to have to take it out of your

[00:10:48] purse take it out of your wallet it's going to be a fight it's going to be a struggle

[00:10:51] you're not going to let them get away and in many states they may not walk away I'm talking

[00:10:55] physically walk away or they may not walk away with their life because you see it you know it

[00:11:01] happens and that money you're going to fight harder to hang on to it because you haven't

[00:11:06] gotten comfortable to this idea numb to the notion that I can just log on to my app on

[00:11:12] the phone and lost lost or stolen and whatevs you're saying no the money is has value

[00:11:18] to me it has value and I'm not going to allow you to just blindly take it maybe you're robbed

[00:11:24] at gunpoint that's rare these days it doesn't mean it doesn't happen carjacking has happened

[00:11:28] at gunpoint but robbing you of your cash is a rare situation okay is that because people

[00:11:35] don't use cash or simply because people are afraid they don't know if the other person

[00:11:39] is going to pull a gun out on you when you try to jack them for their money so thinking

[00:11:43] of this I said have it as an option to allow me to pay cash or tell the gas

[00:11:50] attendant to issue me a code to be able to use the EV charger as an option that will

[00:11:55] increase adoption of this business because now you're allowing the low income out there

[00:12:02] or those that are the quote unbankable which still exist or the ones who can't get a cell

[00:12:07] phone which still exist you're not we've created this elitist mentality even at the lowest level

[00:12:15] of the youth we've created an elitist mentality they're worse now than what we had in the

[00:12:22] yester years when we had segregation because their mind everybody should be able to get a

[00:12:27] cell phone everybody get a cell phone everybody get a bank everybody get a bank account just use

[00:12:30] phones just use expensive thousand dollar phones or whatever or get prepaid doot doot doot get a

[00:12:35] plan doot doot doot run your credit doot doot you got bad credit too bad it's it's elitist

[00:12:40] it's an elitist mentality that excludes a certain set of the population that has nothing

[00:12:45] to do with race by the way there's a certain subset of population who cannot do what you're

[00:12:50] suggesting whether they happen to be people that are coming out of prison people that are

[00:12:54] coming out of the hospital people that are coming out of comas people that are disabled

[00:12:58] people that are blind people that are hearing this whatever there are so many people that

[00:13:04] are disenfranchised by these young people who are single-minded narrow focused into pushing

[00:13:10] towards a future that is exclusive and not inclusive so when you do that and i see these

[00:13:17] rebuttals it tells me where we are as a society it tells me there's a subset of people

[00:13:22] and these are the ones that the businesses are listening to and they're saying well must be

[00:13:27] the right answer because they want it the kids want it and they're not walking like they used

[00:13:32] to door-to-door polling the older populations some of the older will say we don't care but

[00:13:38] some of the older i think do care some of the older actually would say i think it's stupid

[00:13:42] i think i should be able to do this i think i should be able to do that i think when your

[00:13:45] bill dollar bill says legal tender for all debts public and private it should mean you

[00:13:50] are required to accept this i don't care what you say figure it out i don't care if it's

[00:13:54] a machine but you are required to accept this you cannot force me to give you plastic as so

[00:14:00] many do so understanding this now realizing the world that we are in and the world that

[00:14:06] we're going to i had to take a step back and try to i'll say escape into the past but try

[00:14:13] just take a step back and think how then does this tie into relationships right in a

[00:14:20] relationship invariably you will have one person who thinks one thing one person who

[00:14:26] thinks another thing and they will not agree which is i would argue in my personal opinion

[00:14:31] one of the contributors to the damage of relationships that we see happening now

[00:14:36] well i was looking at some books that were talking about the different i wanted to learn

[00:14:41] the other side you know i know my side i know how i think i know how i feel i actually had

[00:14:46] this conversation with a girl way back 2003 i'll never forget this that i worked with

[00:14:53] and she was trying to get her music in order and she asked me to help her out and she said can i

[00:14:57] stop by and have you help me get my music all in order because she knew i knew a music

[00:15:02] organization and cd birding and all this stuff this is at a time prior to the the rise of mp3

[00:15:08] purchases by the way sure she comes by and no big deal i don't think anything of it because

[00:15:14] at that time i was actively not seeking any relationship nothing i just wasn't so we're

[00:15:21] doing the music we're just chatting all of a sudden and she knew that i had a number of

[00:15:26] friends on the floor all of a sudden she asked me out of the clear blue and this is exactly

[00:15:31] what she asked me i know you're going to think it's a weird question but this is exactly what

[00:15:34] she asked me she says quote would you ever consider dating a black girl because that's what

[00:15:41] she was odd question completely out of left field i didn't understand the origin i understand

[00:15:48] going but there was no background there was no build there was no lead up to it it just was

[00:15:53] random i had never spent any time with this girl at all and i you know she's attractive

[00:15:58] but she wasn't my type of the time and i suspected you know i was just in my groove

[00:16:05] i was just focused on the work and that's what it was which is a different story for

[00:16:08] a different time and i told her the honest unvarnished truth in my answer and i learned

[00:16:15] that a lot of women hate this answer conceptually but to me it's i'm being honest and you should

[00:16:22] appreciate honesty but i said something to the effect of i don't remember the exact quote but i

[00:16:27] something to the effect of no because i'm i'm difficult i'm challenging i'm very

[00:16:34] difficult too challenging for black women to be able to deal with something to that effect

[00:16:39] that that was telling the truth because i learned it i learned you know the very first

[00:16:43] girlfriend i had black girl the second girl i had black girl third girl i had black girl and so on

[00:16:48] it wasn't until later that i was more open to different types of women you know outside of the

[00:16:55] pocket that i was in but i learned from each and every one of them a different way of

[00:17:00] evaluating myself to accept i'm just too challenging for black women it's what it is

[00:17:06] because if you were to try to date me you're going to need that you're going to want that

[00:17:10] work you're going to want that smoke you're going to want to fight and a lot of black women will

[00:17:15] not fight right they will not fight and if you don't fight or don't feel like you want to fight

[00:17:21] that means you don't want me right because you're not trying to fight for me in my head this

[00:17:27] makes all the sense in the world mind you this is in my 20s i'm thinking okay they didn't

[00:17:33] the first girlfriend i had she fought she fought she pushed to get with me which is why we

[00:17:39] ended up together we didn't stay together because she stopped fighting okay the second girlfriend

[00:17:45] all we did was fight but she didn't fight for me she fought for herself okay i understood third

[00:17:50] girlfriend didn't fight at all we didn't last okay like it's a lesson learned after i said

[00:17:56] this to her she her face changed and i you know we never talked again after this well

[00:18:03] fast forward then and as i'm dating different ones i see i'm not wrong i see it's all about

[00:18:10] the fight it's all about proving it's all about validating this is what i want this i want you

[00:18:18] and i'm going to fight for you to make it work or to make me work or to make me appealing

[00:18:23] or to make this work i'm putting in the work where it's not one-sided i can put in the work

[00:18:31] all i care to whether it's you know me spending time or it's me trying to be helpful or me

[00:18:37] offering i never forget the girl and this was way before this was way i think i was i don't

[00:18:43] even remember how old i was i want to say i was like 17 or something but i'll never forget the

[00:18:48] girl where we went to plaza manina mall down there in san diego and the little site entrance

[00:18:55] that we always would go into and i think we were going to the movies that day and i went

[00:18:59] to open the door for her and she said quote i don't need a nigga to open the door for me

[00:19:03] straight direct quotes what she said that all i did was open the door i didn't say anything it

[00:19:08] just in my mind let me open the door for you and from that point on i don't have a problem

[00:19:13] opening the door but i had to learn okay she was not there's nothing here this ain't gonna

[00:19:19] work there's nothing here because if you're so if you're so angry inside you won't even let

[00:19:27] a guy open the door this this isn't going to work out so from that point forward i settled in my

[00:19:34] head it's that's it's i don't want to say war but it's a fight it's a fight for what you

[00:19:40] believe right martin luther king fought for what he believed you know malcolm x fought for

[00:19:44] what he believed various women in the music industry fought for what they you know courtly

[00:19:49] love was fighting maya was fighting arefa was fighting people fight and it's the fight it's the

[00:19:55] struggle right and that defines you of how hard you're willing to fight some people don't want

[00:20:01] to fight they they just simply do not either believe they should or simply don't want to

[00:20:07] but the fight defines you it creates the narrative and if you're talking relationships

[00:20:14] they don't mean anything if one of the two is not willing to fight that was the lesson that

[00:20:20] was the aha moment well then now you start your analysis well why would you not want to fight well

[00:20:28] there's the obvious right if you're just hanging out with somebody because they're cool you're

[00:20:32] probably not going to fight you don't see it you're not inclined to do it if you're just

[00:20:36] with somebody because they're cute you're probably not going to fight too hard maybe you do but

[00:20:40] doubtful that you do or if it's all about the money are you fighting because you're worried

[00:20:45] about that spigot getting turned off are you fighting because somebody is a friend of the family

[00:20:50] are you fighting because of just you don't want to be alone think it through of where and when

[00:20:56] you fight and wearing when you don't which led me then to do some more digging later as to well

[00:21:04] why why do i think that that's the right answer why do i think that the fight is the

[00:21:10] right answer and i stumbled across a number of books that we're talking about from a female's

[00:21:15] perspective now because again i know myself from a female's perspective here's what we suggest and

[00:21:21] there's a variety of them out there and i may suggest one or two but i noticed a pattern in

[00:21:28] some of them and i noticed the responses of these people being attacked for what they said

[00:21:34] but the analogy being made i'll share was when you're a little girl and this isn't all the

[00:21:41] time but it's kind of the expected common when you're a little girl very you know six five four

[00:21:48] the dollhouse is a thing right and you think about the dollhouse it's something that you take

[00:21:53] pride in caring for it you take pride in fixing it up you take pride in how you furnish

[00:22:00] it you take pride in how you place your figures in it you might even be over protective about

[00:22:05] anybody else messing with your dollhouse the analogy was made that as a woman one thing you

[00:22:12] should be is just as proud when if you're a housewife or when you become a housewife

[00:22:18] whether you're married or not at the time that you become it but when you become that role of

[00:22:24] taking care of a house and a home that you should have the same level of pride as you would

[00:22:30] have had when you were six or seven playing with your dollhouse and a lot of people attacked that

[00:22:35] notion a lot of people the word childlike came up a lot of people attacked that saying

[00:22:41] you're treating you're making people think they have to act or think like a child

[00:22:48] and some of these authors are saying well consider why do you want to act like anything

[00:22:53] more than that why would you not want to act at the basic level like you actually care because

[00:23:00] consider the home that you're taking care of at what point do you lose sight of being thankful

[00:23:08] that you have a house that you can take care of and consider how many don't when you start

[00:23:14] developing a family now this again more attacks all women are all they're good for is having

[00:23:19] kids i actually had this conversation with somebody about the whole harrison butker i

[00:23:24] believe his name is and you know the statements he made and he was misrepresented in what he was

[00:23:30] saying because he said something to the he i'm not going to quote him directly but he said

[00:23:35] something to the effect of you know as as women out there what are you going to be more proud

[00:23:40] of your work or your kids in your household that you take care of and that got misrepresented

[00:23:45] into well he just thinks of us as nothing but housewives which isn't what he was saying

[00:23:51] what he was saying is when the dust clears and you look back on your life so this requires

[00:23:56] reflection this requires really thinking about your life now and future and past

[00:24:03] when you really look back later when you had to go to work eight to five nine to five whatever

[00:24:10] when you had to work overtime and you're working with people that you know don't care

[00:24:15] about you they really don't for salary that's not that good having to do commutes that are a

[00:24:21] waste of your time the time you had to spend not with your kids for whatever reason

[00:24:27] the level of effort that you had to put in just to be able to make the money necessary

[00:24:33] to raise that household what he's saying is are you really going to say that you were proud

[00:24:39] that you went to work and followed somebody else's orders that doesn't care about you

[00:24:43] or are you going to be more proud of the home you built the family you raised the happy household

[00:24:50] chances are you're going to be more proud of your marriage your household your children

[00:24:56] you that role that's where you're going to be proud this guy harrison's a proud catholic

[00:25:02] nothing he's saying is shocking or weird people got set off because of the way he said it but

[00:25:08] there's nothing wrong with what he conceptually said because we all know it's the truth

[00:25:13] your family that you build as a housewife and i'll use the word though offensive to some

[00:25:19] that's the role you are going to be more proud of that because it's the hardest job that you

[00:25:25] have the hardest job that you have is not that person telling you to put paperwork together

[00:25:30] and type up some sort of a whatever email to some customer that's not a matter of pride

[00:25:36] the home that you sold as a realtor that's not a matter of pride none of that matters

[00:25:41] because those are single points in time your lifespan is around the family that you create

[00:25:48] and the family that you develop and if you fall short in those that's going to hurt you and

[00:25:53] bother you more than what happens at work that was the point he made so when these analogies

[00:25:58] are made to the dollhouse the question was well why are you why do you feel like being a

[00:26:03] housewife is such a bad thing shouldn't you be proud that you even have a house to take care

[00:26:07] of shouldn't you think about the people that don't have it and be constantly thankful every day

[00:26:13] and if you can keep that mentality it's going to lead to a happier marriage there are other

[00:26:17] things that are going to come into the marriage coming to play some things you can't do anything

[00:26:21] about and it goes to some of the youth narrative out there of that you're being influenced by

[00:26:27] media and social media to believe certain things are okay that are not okay well if you

[00:26:33] remove those influences and i do include social media and i do include mobile phone things

[00:26:39] perhaps it gives you a different perspective on where you want to be and where you should be

[00:26:43] and more to think about these are ahas and i'm going to dig deeper into the ahas but i want

[00:26:50] to leave you with something to think about of the influence that some of these have on our

[00:26:54] young people that's causing them to think that certain things are okay that are not okay to

[00:27:00] them it's all they know i understand it requires voices of those roughly in my age range and older

[00:27:08] to not stop the narrative that these are not okay you have to think about others you have

[00:27:16] to think about not just what you want but also others but you also have to bring yourself back

[00:27:22] down to a little bit of reality about what's important is it really so important to sit on

[00:27:27] your phone scrolling through stuff all day long is it really so important to do text messages

[00:27:33] because you can't be arsed to get on the phone is it really so important to go to work every

[00:27:39] day as opposed to work being with your family spending time with your family perhaps this is

[00:27:44] my statement not from the books but perhaps some of these distractions that have now infested

[00:27:53] are a large part of the reason why relationships aren't working anymore perhaps people have not sat

[00:27:59] down to understand what they really need and want truly need and want not what somebody tells

[00:28:04] them perhaps some people simply don't care about what other people need and want perhaps

[00:28:12] and this is just me saying this more people should read actual physical books and get a

[00:28:19] different opinion about things that they thought were true that are just lies

[00:28:26] i know what i want i know what i need which is why i made the statement i am challenging

[00:28:35] i accept that i'm challenging the challenge won't go away because it's all about the fight

[00:28:41] right value self-worth means you should want somebody to fight for you and you should be

[00:28:49] okay for people that don't want to do the fighting that's perfectly fine you you make up

[00:28:55] your own mind whatever you choose if you don't want to fight don't fight but you should have

[00:29:00] enough self-worth from yourself to want people to want to fight for you which means you have

[00:29:06] to make yourself appealing you have to increase your value to other people and perhaps

[00:29:13] increasing your value to other people has to take a front seat before you can logically

[00:29:18] ask other people to put you first if you don't put yourself first why do you expect other

[00:29:23] people to put you first and if technology is telling you by technology it doesn't mean

[00:29:29] take it doesn't matter if it's tiktok youtube whatever if technology is telling you that

[00:29:34] everybody else is the problem like with taylor swift songs for example consider that's a one-sided

[00:29:40] opinion consider what value and self-worth really means it means understanding what you

[00:29:47] bring to the table it means if you don't bring enough to the table you probably should change

[00:29:53] that but it also means what is it that you're trying to bring to the table and is it of any

[00:29:59] value because maybe you bring a lot to the table that doesn't mean anything or isn't of

[00:30:03] any value to anybody else accept that and be okay with it don't put it on other people

[00:30:10] think if you're female now ending if you're female think about how you perceive

[00:30:18] the roles when we say traditional gender roles the roles the role of a housewife to consider

[00:30:25] what it is the role of a housewife is not demeaning the role of a housewife is not

[00:30:30] disrespectful the role of a housewife is not a negative the role of a housewife is the hardest

[00:30:35] role challenge fight it is the greatest challenge you would ever face if you're afraid of the

[00:30:43] challenge aka you don't want the smoke it's okay say that don't trash the role say that you

[00:30:51] you don't have the constitution to do that role it's not for you and you will not accept

[00:30:57] that role it's too much for you you're not willing to do that fighting you're not willing

[00:31:02] to accept that challenge and it's okay for people to say that on the men's side

[00:31:08] if you're the kind of person who believes that's all that a woman's good for

[00:31:14] consider why that is why do you think that that's all they're really good for

[00:31:18] is that really what you think or perhaps you see that they're not even making the first step

[00:31:23] in that direction have the conversation that that's what you want because you have to be

[00:31:29] clear if that's what you expect if you're not clear with them up front i'm talking before

[00:31:34] you get into bed with them by the way if you're not clear that that's what you expect and you

[00:31:38] say i want you to fight for me right you will fight for me you're fighting for me and what i

[00:31:45] bring if you aren't worth it they're not going to fight that means you're not going

[00:31:50] to get what you want that means you got to improve your self-worth so if you're doing stuff that

[00:31:54] you know decreases your value perhaps you should change those things i'm not saying that you

[00:31:59] should i'm saying consider it it's all about your self-value before you can put yourself to

[00:32:06] somebody else saying do that and then getting pissed off when they don't do it that's not

[00:32:10] the way reality is you've got to start with yourself improve your value and then sell yourself

[00:32:18] and say i am worth fighting for and accept that some people will not fight

[00:32:24] and for the people that will not fight except why you will not fight have a good reason that

[00:32:29] you're not going to fight other than you just don't trash the role trash yourself and say

[00:32:35] i'm not ready for that like having children if you're not ready to have children or don't want

[00:32:39] to have children be proud of that don't let other people tell you it's bad or wrong perhaps

[00:32:45] your financial situation is not conducive to raising a child that means you're looking out

[00:32:49] for the child's best interest that's that's not anything to be ashamed of you should be proud

[00:32:53] of these things all of it works together so the dollhouse concept is powerful you should be

[00:32:59] treating that role as the as you'd be thankful be grateful that you even have the opportunity

[00:33:06] to do that when so many of them do not so many of them never will you should be grateful

[00:33:13] not distasted you should not feel lessened by it that's media that's technology that's your phone

[00:33:21] telling you something and you're absorbing it like a sponge that's the trap you've got to fight

[00:33:27] it think of how many celebrities are out there after they get out of the business that are

[00:33:32] raising kids that are having a household they're going out shopping because they crave it they

[00:33:36] know it's the greatest challenge it's not touring like many of them will tell you

[00:33:43] touring is nothing doing the work is nothing doing the recordings nothing

[00:33:47] signing autographs is it's pleasing but it's not their fulfillment their fulfillment comes

[00:33:52] from raising the family being a housewife for a change even kim kardasian for what she's doing

[00:33:59] she'll swear no the moment she actually became happy was when she became a mother

[00:34:04] all i'm saying for your thought process women if you don't want the smoke be okay with the reason

[00:34:11] that you don't want to smoke it's not about being a housewife you just aren't ready for

[00:34:15] that smoke you don't want it it's not you're not ready for it great for the men if you want

[00:34:22] the woman to be that you got to make yourself appealing enough that she's willing to fight for

[00:34:26] you to become that and then you have to support her when she does become that it all ties

[00:34:31] together if something's missing it's going to fail that's on the people it's not the role it's

[00:34:36] on the people the media will never tell you that the media will sell that the role is a negative

[00:34:43] in this quote modern enlightened world there's nothing enlightened other than the fact that

[00:34:48] nobody's happy anymore everything is worse than it's ever been and spiritually i'm not even

[00:34:54] talking religion but spiritually we're not in a better place than we were in a distant past